Petition Launched to Obliterate Dingwall

A petition has appeared on a government website calling for the “total annihilation of Dingwall”.

At the time of print, the sensible petition had gained almost 80,000 signatures, which just happens to be the population of the great town city of Inverness.

The petition’s particulars go on to say that it was “Time to get shot of it”, with the reason given “because it’s shite”… compelling reasoning I think you’ll agree.

When jarred, a nameless Highland Council spokesperson said:

“aye, they’re probably right. No cunt goes there unless they have to. Even councillors avoid the place, mainly cos the brothels are pretty rank.

I, for one, will be signing it a few times.”

A second petition has been launched to move the Dingwall Wimpy to Inverness brick by brick.